Nidhi Mukherjee, 2/12 Week 11 - Reticence and Harsh Words
“I hate you, Mom!”
The bitter words ring out like the sharp cries of an ambulance rushing down the street with much fervor, seemingly silencing everything in their path as the surrounding world plunges into a state that is deathly reticent.
Cue laugh track.
If I could point out a glaring difference between my personal life and the lives led in American television shows, I would likely bring up the observed discrepancy between how I answer to my parents versus how kids in American sitcoms do.
Growing up as a second-generation immigrant in an Asian and strictly religious household limited my words—to put it bluntly. Being born as the oldest daughter to such a family, I had to follow a set of unwritten and unspoken rules to present myself as reserved, yet well-spoken. Calm, yet thoughtful. Caring, yet never overly passionate.
As such, when I first laid my eyes and ears on the loud and defiant teenage girl on American TV, my jaw quite literally dropped. My eyes widened as I took in the headstrong lines on her face, her eyes narrowed in rage and frustration towards her mother, the words acrimoniously spit out in a blend of fury and bitterness.
“I hate you, Mom!”
A pause. A hush. The second hand of the clock seems to slow down.
Cue laugh track.
Despite it being everything I had ever been taught about restraint and tranquility, I could not help but be awestruck. Fascinated. Reverential. Envious.
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| Rebellion - Teenage smoker, courtesy of Ed Templeton |
The fervent combination of the blaringly caustic words with the vehemently charged emotions created a shocking parallel to my quiet, restrained nature.
P.S.: Let’s not forget about discipline. After the verbal onslaught, I remember the girl storming up to her room while her mother merely sighed an exasperated, “Teenagers these days.”
Hi Nidhi, I similarly believe that Hollywood often alters the reality of people living in America because people who turn on the television to watch such shows have no desire to be strung into arguments, especially in a supposedly comforting family show. Although I do not carry the weight of being the eldest child like you, I similarly follow the unwritten rules of being reserved, always remembering to respect my elders. My realization of such differences between television shows and reality never settled in until I watched _Dance Moms_, a show that highlights the arguments between the moms and the dance teacher, who points the punishment towards their child. Due to missed opportunities, the mom and child get into heated arguments where the child often says harsh words they don’t really mean. Similarly, in _Everything I Never Told You_, Celeste Ng depicts the reticent nature of the members of the Lee family and how they never speak the full truth about something because they see it as embarrassing or unnecessary. Overall, I like your neatly crafted diction as well as the format of your blog; the transitions between each topic flow well and highlight your main points.
ReplyDeleteHi Nidhi! You broach a really interesting comparison between the differences in dynamics across families from different cultural backgrounds. Very much like you, I’m the eldest daughter in my family. When I was younger, if I ever became angry, it would quickly be assumed that I had picked up the behavior from peers at school or from characters in a television show, much like the one you made your blog post about–if that was never true and I was merely expressing my frustration in a way I knew how. Yet I know that it would be over for me if I ever shouted at my parents in a fit of anger. I really love how all of your blogs have utilized such strong diction, pacing, and comparisons in order to emphasize your points, such as how you portray the balance between being “reserved, yet well-spoken” and “caring, yet never overly passionate” in this one. This also made me think about Everything I Never Told You and the precarious balance between Marilyn’s desire to stand out and James’ desire to blend in–and how their two opposing wishes are reflected in their family dynamics. I think that there should still be a balance, but it should instead be one between disciplining blatantly disrespectful behavior and providing space for children to process and express their emotions openly without fear of disrupting the unspoken status quo. Thank you for sharing!
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