Colin Phan - Week #16: It's Over
It’s funny how I complain about how long the days are, but end up wondering why this school year went by so fast. I thought I would be burnt out and ready to delete every Google Doc I’ve ever written by the end of this year, but instead, I feel more reflective. It’s like this class managed to wedge itself into my memory in a good way without me noticing.
When we first started, I dreaded the ANNOTATIONS. I’ve used up over 20 pens this school year (maybe I lost a few as well, I don’t know where they all went 😭). These blogs were a bit tiring to think of ideas to write, but once I had an idea, I think I’ve enjoyed writing them. I was forced to stop and think about language, identity, America, power, and last but not least, me. I feel like I learned a lot about myself as well as about you all during our time together in our blog cohorts.
POAS. Where do I even begin? It was at first just going to be another research project. Just a presentation. Just another assignment. But through the months of preparation, I was telling Pelé’s story like it was mine. I could feel the weight of his influence. The power of his voice. This “random” presentation which I thought was another assignment allowed me to realize how so many people, even people who weren’t living in America for most of their lives, could make such a difference to American society today.
As I look back on this school year, I would say this was my hardest class as well as the class I will remember the most. We all learned how to pay attention, to turn in homework with strict deadlines, but most importantly, we learned from each other through the stories we tell. We learn from the voice in our heads asking questions like “What do I really think?” Somewhere between all of this (the 29384198471947194817419847319879 assignments due tomorrow night by 11:59 PM on Google Classroom and Turnitin.com, the frustration of ANNOTATIONS, the many timed writes, the laughter in preparation for POAS and the Gatsby party, and the blogs), I was able to find a version of myself that kept adapting and growing up.
I think I would miss this. Most likely not the work. NOT the ANNOTATIONS. But I am going to miss the space we created in this class. It’s hard to explain, but over a game of Gartic Phone, you would get it.
If memory is the act of choosing what matters enough to keep, then I know I would take a few things from this class that I’ll carry with me (The Things They Carried, get it?).
See you soon,
Colin Phan
Hey Colin! I agree—it feels so surreal to think that this year is actually coming to a close. Junior year is infamous for its workload as students strive to rack up statistics, and I still remember being first a freshman, then a sophomore, watching with mixed awe and dread as that year’s juniors trudged through the hallways, laden with heavy book bags and heavier eye bags. (Okay, that was an exaggeration, but it certainly has felt like that at times.) Funnily enough, annotation pens are something that I’m including in my “The Things We Carry” collage. Annotations have permanently changed the way I view literature—I quite literally can’t read anything without thinking about how I would write a rhetorical essay on it. I can’t even send an Instagram reel without thinking about it sometimes! I absolutely agree that this class has contributed a lot to my growth this year, both in and out of an AP classroom near me. With the AP exam in less than twenty-four hours, my mind is running through everything we’ve done over the past year, and even though just looking at my annotation pens makes my hand ache, I find that I wouldn’t have it any other way. Thanks for sharing, and good luck to everyone on the exam!
ReplyDeleteHi Colin,
ReplyDeleteAfter finishing AP exams, I was enticed to click on and read your blog because of its title. I completely agree with you that this was my hardest class this year as well as the class that I will remember the most for a while. I like how you use personal anecdotes and recall past memories in order to show your journey through junior year as well as showing us how you overcame these challenges. I also like how you use capitalization to make certain things pop out to the reader like the dreaded annotations which I will also not be missing. I also like how you incorporate POAS in your blog as that is something that I will never forget about this year because I truly felt like I was Elvis Presley for 5 minutes during my presentation, and I forgot about everything that I had to do that period. Overall, I enjoyed reading all of your blogs.
-Krish